Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

Five miles in two hours.

This is my stuck in fucking traffic face.

Okay, So Who Am I Really?

This is actually the ultimate question. The pat Buddhist answer is that I (or you for that matter) does not exist. But what do we mean by that? This refers to the dependent nature of all phenomena. All things and beings are not only dependent on causes and conditions in order for them to come into being, they are also dependent on their parts.

Simple example. You are sitting in front of your computer. The computer has a keyboard, a screen, all the computer guts like the microprocessor and all that stuff. But if we examine the computer closely and try to find where the computer-ness of the computer actually is, we will fail. The computer only exists as a sum of its parts; it is not in the keyboard, not in the screen, etc. You may say that the computer is in the microprocessor. But where in the microprocessor? If you dissect the microprocessor, it is also dependent on its parts. And when the power is turned off, is it still a computer? Or is it a paperweight? As a result of this analysis we must come to the conclusion that the computer does not exist inherently, but only as the sum of its parts. And likewise for all of its parts.

Now if I turn this type of analysis toward myself and try to find what I call "me" I must come to the same conclusion. I can look at my limbs and ask if I am my limbs? I must conclude that I am not because if I lose my limbs, I am still me. How much of my body could I lose and still be me? Well, have you ever seen someone and thought, "I wish I had his or her body?" Clearly we believe that our "self" is not a function of our bodies. So what of our mind? Sitting in meditation and looking at the mind we can see that the mind is imbued by a series of thoughts, one after another, the present thought being an effect of the previous and the cause for the next. So our thoughts are not who we are. But what is behind all of these thoughts? What is the nature of the mind? Is that where we reside? Mind seems to be a process not a thing so I do not think I could posit being into it.

This is where I'm at with the whole "who am I?" thing. I do not exist other than the sum of my parts and processes. "I" is utterly dependent and does not exist inherently.

Most religions deposit self in something called a soul or atman. But if you look for it, it cannot be found. It is a "blind faith" belief. And I have a serious problem with blind faith.

Well "I" need to go to work. So "I" will continue later tonight with the problem of dualities. Oh boy, you can hardly wait.

Okay, so who am I.

My friend Airyn led me to these quizes (links below). In case you were wondering, here's who I am:

You're the United Nations!

Most people think you're ineffective, but you are trying to completely save the world from itself, so there's always going to be a long way to go.  You're always the one trying to get friends to talk to each other, enemies to talk to each other, anyone who can to just talk instead of beating each other about the head and torso.  Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, and you get very schizophrenic as a result.  But your heart is in the right place, and sometimes also in New York.


Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

Well, let's narrow this down.

You're Alaska!

You're big, bulky, and extremely wild. At the same time, you're rather cold and standoffish, even a loner of sorts. Taming you may be one of the last great quests of the people who do manage to find you or even seek you out. So many of them just want to plunder you for what you have of value, but there are a few, the ones
who will stick with you, that truly value your rugged remoteness. As long as no one is spilling stuff on you, you are truly beautiful.


Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Ohhhh... This is why I had a Spiderman fixation as a kid.

You're a Spider!

It seems like you have eyes in the back of your head sometimes, and you have an uncanny knack for creeping people out with that ability. You really enjoy eating wraps, though you like them even more if you made them yourself. You work tirelessly so that you can eat, but are good at getting rid of annoyances for other people. There's always just a little more drama than necessary when you're around. Oh, what tangled webs you weave!


Take the Animal Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Hmmmm... this one is interesting.

You're Siddhartha!

by Hermann Hesse

You simply don't know what to believe, but you're willing to try anything once. Western values, Eastern values, hedonism and minimalism, you've spent some time in every camp. But you still don't have any idea what camp you belong in. This makes you an individualist of the highest order, but also really lonely. It's time to chill out under a tree. And realize that at least you believe in ferries.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

If I were a train?

You're the Empire Builder!

An admirer of Lewis & Clark, you have a firm belief in Manifest Destiny. Your destiny has manifested itself in a northern and at times desolate existence, but you don't mind life on the mountainside with snow and goats. Though your glory days are well past you, many still come to visit you to talk about the old times and get a taste for what you were like back in your prime. If you were a dish soap, it would be Cascade.


Take the Trains and Railroads Quiz
at RMI Miniature Railroads.

I don't get this one:

You're Claremont McKenna College!

Founded in a belief in money, you have said that civilization prospers with commerce. You are remarkably successful for your young age and small stature, though you still have quite a ways to go. While you seem so small, you know much of your success is owed to your close friends who stay near you at all times. Perhaps a little too near. Deep down, you never want to enter the real world.


Take the University Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Small stature. Yeah, that's a good one.

Okay so I took the University one again and a funny thing happened...

You're the University of Washington!

A visionary for your area, you truly can see it all. At the same time, you used to be prone to burning out and trying to do it all. You have to remember that you're just one person, and can't be responsible for a whole community. But this is a lesson you've managed to learn long ago and now you rely on all sorts of people. Many of them really enjoy looking at you. Even though it seems like an out-of-date phrase, you're a big fan of dubbing things.


Take the University Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Well This was a useless if not amusing waste of time.

Trickle-Down

Holy shit. When the hell are Republicans going to give up on this bogus theory? Give tax cuts to the wealthiest of Americans and somehow, defying the innate greed and avarice that makes a wealthy American wealthy, the bounty will trickle down to the rest of us poor saps. This bullshit has been shoveled at us through every Republican administration in my lifetime and it has NEVER FUCKING WORKED! And the fact that this administration wants to try it yet again makes this pacifist want to slap the shit out of every trickle-down economist that he can get his hands on.

Fuck you'd think they would learn. The gusher of money that we let the richest Americans keep evaporates before it reaches the ground where the rest of us live. Screw trickle-down just cut my taxes for a change and let the folks at the top benefit from my increased buying power.

BOTTOM-UP ECONOMICS!!! The bottom of the food chain must be healthy in order for the top of the food chain to prosper. And in the trophic levels of the economic food chain I’m grass.

Maybe that’s why they keep shoveling this bullshit on me.

And again I say, holy shit!

Cougars, Coyotes, and Bears. Oh my.

There has been a lot of stories in the news lately about people being attacked by wild animals. And people are shocked and outraged anytime a person is killed by a cougar or a bear. So much so that the offending creature is inevitably hunted down and shot. Because after all, how dare an animal attack a human? Don't they know their place?

God gave humans dominion over animals, right? They are here to serve us as we see fit, right?

Bullshit.

Some people believe that there is nothing larger than the universe. But it seems to me that even the universe is not large enough to contain human arrogance. How is life more precious to a human than to any other creature? Mahatma Gandhi once said "To my mind, the life of a lamb is no less precious than that of a human being.  I should be unwilling to take the life of a lamb for the sake of the human body." There is nothing more divine about being born a human rather than a chipmunk or an elk. Don't get me wrong, being born human is very fortunate. People have a greater capacity to reason than animals. The problem is that we seldom use that capacity to generate compassion for those creatures who take a less fortunate birth than ourselves.

When an animal attacks and perhaps kills a person it is driven by survival and instinct. This is unlike humans that often kill for greed, revenge, or even pleasure. Human beings have moved past the necessity of killing for survival. When a person goes out into the woods to kill for pleasure it is called sport; when a grizzly bear, driven by hunger and instinct, attacks and kills a person, it is called a monster and is hunted down and destroyed. But I got news for you folks, when you walk into the wilderness, when you buy a house that is close to wildlife, you should not be surprised when a coyote tries to take a bite out of your ass. And what's more, it is your damn fault not the animal's. Don't be a dumb-ass and don't blame the animal.

Our intelligence and technological development could allow us to push past our savage instincts. Humans do not need to kill to survive, they choose to out of habit. Albert Einstein said that "nothing will benefit human health and increase chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet." So perhaps it is time to start breaking antiquated habits for the good of all the creatures on the planet, including ourselves.

What's worse is that people kill (animals and each other) for something called justice. Killing as a vehicle for justice is nothing more than revenge. It serves no purpose whatsoever other than to fuel the cycle of violence. You cannot make something right by committing the same wrong.

Everyone dies, that's the fact. It is killing that is wrong. Perhaps when our species finally figures this out we can begin to evolve again. We are supposedly the ones with the increased capacity for thought. We should start using this capacity to develop compassion rather than as a tool for greed, anger, and domination.

I don't give a shit.

Okay folks I'm starting a list of shit in the news or elsewhere that I really don't give a shit about and am tired of hearing.

Please add to the list.

I'll start:

Tom Cruise in Aberdeen.
David Blaine in a fish tank.
The NBA playoffs (I want Law & Order back!).